Does Environmentally Sound Make A Noise?
27919
Recreation & Sports > Humor
Jun 18, 2007
kphirst
Does Environmentally Sound Make A Noise?
A litterbug is someone who drops something, but picks it up when asked. Litterbugs who don't respond to "Excuse me, you dropped something" should be called litter roaches. Frequently you see people in orange vests picking up litter along highways. Often this is punishment for their wrongdoings. Unfortunately, when wrongdoers pick up others' wrongdoings, two wrongs don't make a right. Global warming isn't right, but the concept needs to be re-explained to my mother-in-law. Because it snowed heavily in Rhode Island this past winter, she wants to be reassured Al Gore isn't snowing her. Electric cars are one way to reduce global warming. Unfortunately, there aren't enough recharging stations or long enough extension cords to make them practical. Using ethanol instead of gasoline would reduce global warming too. Ethanol is made from corn. Although network sitcoms produce an endless amount of corn, Brazil produces more. The country that invented electricity, polio vaccine and the pet rock is behind Brazil - nuts! Some people think tree huggers are nuts. Maybe they can be overly enthusiastic; but considering trees take in the carbon dioxide we put out, tree huggers are also trying to save our family trees. We could save sea life if we disposed of Styrofoam and plastic containers responsibly. Because there have been warnings that microwaving Styrofoam and plastic can produce carcinogens, we might see life better ourselves if we realized Styrofoam and plastic can be dangerous to us too. Dangerous sewage spills frequently close beaches. In spite of thinking of the ocean as my beautiful backyard, only my enthusiasm for swimming in it has gotten all wet. Where there's ocean there's sand. When there's wind and sand, there can be sand dunes across our street. It's against the law to put this sand back on the beach because it's been contaminated. I understand that. What I don't understand is why the city is waiting for the Sandman to clean it up. I do understand, however, why the grass is always greener in the other fellow's yard. He uses chemicals, which can seep into the soil and into the drinking water. I'd use a sign that said, "Chemical Free Yard". Eve being thrown out of the Garden of Eden was a sign. After taking a bite of the apple, what did she do with the rest of it? Throwing it on the ground got Eve kicked out of the Garden of Eden.
KNIGHT PIERCE HIRST takes humorous looks at life. Take a minute to make yourself smile at http://knightwatch.typepad.com
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