Monsters in Meetings - Part 5, Dominant Participants
245
Business > Management
Mar 1, 2007
Steve Kaye
Monsters in Meetings - Part 5, Dominant Participants
Most meetings are attended by a giant.
These are the people who dominate a meeting with big ideas and big voices and big talk.
While dominant participants contribute significantly to the success of a meeting, they can also overwhelm, intimidate, and exclude others. Thus, you want to control their energy without losing their support.
Here's what to do.
Approach 1: Ask others to contribute
Asking quiet participants to contribute indirectly moderates the more dominant participants. Say:
"Before we continue, I want to hear from the rest of the group."
"This is great. And I wonder what else we could do." (Look at the quiet participants when you say this.)
Approach 2: Change the process
A balanced dialogue equalizes participation and sequential participation (a round robin) prevents anyone from dominating the discussion.
Approach 3: Include them in the process
Ask dominant participants for their support during the meeting. Meet with the person privately and say:
"I need your help with something. It's clear to me that you know a great deal about this issue and have many good ideas. I also want to hear what other people in the meeting have to say. So, I wonder if you could help me encourage others to contribute."
You can also retain control by giving away minor tasks. For example, dominant participants make excellent helpers. They can distribute materials, run errands, serve as scribes, deliver messages, post chart papers, run demonstration units, operate projectors, change overhead transparencies, act as greeters, and (in general) perform any logistical task related to the meeting.
Approach 4: Create barriers
Simply move away from the more aggressive participants and make less eye contact. If you are unable to see them, you are unable to recognize them as the next speaker.
Use this approach with moderation and support it with complimentary requests for assistance. Ignoring someone conveys disapproval, which could change a potential ally into an adversary.
Approach 5: One point at a time
Sometimes dominant participants will control a discussion by listing many points in a single statement. They cite every challenge, condition, and consideration known, which completely clogs everyone else's thinking. End this by asking participants to state only one point at a time, after which someone else speaks. It is very difficult to monopolize a discussion when this technique is used.
Quiet participants often hope to be ignored; dominant participants want to be noticed. A quiet person may feel overbearing after making two statements in an hour. A dominant participant may feel left out after contributing only 95% of the ideas. You will be most successful moderating dominant participants by building bridges between what they want and what you need.
Approach 6: Interrupt with "excuse me"
Use the words "excuse me" as a wedge to interrupt a long monologue. It's important that you say "Excuse me" with polite sincerity. For example, you could say:
"Excuse me, this seems interesting and I wonder if you could tell me how it relates to our meeting."
"Excuse me, I'm sure this is very important and since we have only five minutes left for this issue, I wonder if you could summarize your main point."
Use these techniques to hold effective meetings by moderating contributions from the more outspoken participants.
This is the fifth of a seven part article on Monsters in Meetings. - - - Steve Kaye helps leaders hold effective meetings. He is an IAF Certified Professional Facilitator, author, and speaker. His meeting facilitation and leadership workshops create success for everyone. Call 714-528-1300 for details. Visit www.stevekaye.com for a free report.
These are the people who dominate a meeting with big ideas and big voices and big talk.
While dominant participants contribute significantly to the success of a meeting, they can also overwhelm, intimidate, and exclude others. Thus, you want to control their energy without losing their support.
Here's what to do.
Approach 1: Ask others to contribute
Asking quiet participants to contribute indirectly moderates the more dominant participants. Say:
"Before we continue, I want to hear from the rest of the group."
"This is great. And I wonder what else we could do." (Look at the quiet participants when you say this.)
Approach 2: Change the process
A balanced dialogue equalizes participation and sequential participation (a round robin) prevents anyone from dominating the discussion.
Approach 3: Include them in the process
Ask dominant participants for their support during the meeting. Meet with the person privately and say:
"I need your help with something. It's clear to me that you know a great deal about this issue and have many good ideas. I also want to hear what other people in the meeting have to say. So, I wonder if you could help me encourage others to contribute."
You can also retain control by giving away minor tasks. For example, dominant participants make excellent helpers. They can distribute materials, run errands, serve as scribes, deliver messages, post chart papers, run demonstration units, operate projectors, change overhead transparencies, act as greeters, and (in general) perform any logistical task related to the meeting.
Approach 4: Create barriers
Simply move away from the more aggressive participants and make less eye contact. If you are unable to see them, you are unable to recognize them as the next speaker.
Use this approach with moderation and support it with complimentary requests for assistance. Ignoring someone conveys disapproval, which could change a potential ally into an adversary.
Approach 5: One point at a time
Sometimes dominant participants will control a discussion by listing many points in a single statement. They cite every challenge, condition, and consideration known, which completely clogs everyone else's thinking. End this by asking participants to state only one point at a time, after which someone else speaks. It is very difficult to monopolize a discussion when this technique is used.
Quiet participants often hope to be ignored; dominant participants want to be noticed. A quiet person may feel overbearing after making two statements in an hour. A dominant participant may feel left out after contributing only 95% of the ideas. You will be most successful moderating dominant participants by building bridges between what they want and what you need.
Approach 6: Interrupt with "excuse me"
Use the words "excuse me" as a wedge to interrupt a long monologue. It's important that you say "Excuse me" with polite sincerity. For example, you could say:
"Excuse me, this seems interesting and I wonder if you could tell me how it relates to our meeting."
"Excuse me, I'm sure this is very important and since we have only five minutes left for this issue, I wonder if you could summarize your main point."
Use these techniques to hold effective meetings by moderating contributions from the more outspoken participants.
This is the fifth of a seven part article on Monsters in Meetings. - - - Steve Kaye helps leaders hold effective meetings. He is an IAF Certified Professional Facilitator, author, and speaker. His meeting facilitation and leadership workshops create success for everyone. Call 714-528-1300 for details. Visit www.stevekaye.com for a free report.
Write a Review
Add to My Favorite
Refer it to Friend
Report Article
Other links owned by this user
Reduce your fear of speaking by taking the following steps. 1) Conduct Research. Visit or call key participants to ask them what they expect from your presentation. That is, what do they want to learn from it? What do they
Category:
This one creeps up on you. And if you let it continue, it will ruin your meeting. At first it seems that the participants are working toward an agreement. They raise concerns. Then they explore the concerns. It all seems
Category:
Side conversations ruin meetings by destroying focus and fragmenting participation. Here's how to bring your meeting back on track when a side conversation starts. Approach 1: Ask for cooperation Start by asking
Category:
It happens easily. You're conducting a meeting and suddenly a small side meeting starts. Then two side meetings develop. Soon you have many meetings going at once, and all of them are out of control. Or maybe someone introduces
Category:
Most meetings are attended by a giant. These are the people who dominate a meeting with big ideas and big voices and big talk. While dominant participants contribute significantly to the success of a meeting, they can also
Category:
Use these six strategies to communicate effectively. 1) You can accept anything without agreeing with it. Thus, acknowledge amazing requests and outrageous statements with responses such as: "That's an interesting
Category:
You remember these people for the wrong reasons. They are the monsters who hurt others with insults, ridicule, and sarcasm. They bully. They threaten. They attack. And that ruins your meeting. Personal attacks are
Category:
Your outgoing voice mail message tells a lot about you. In fact, it may be the first impression that you make with a new client. Here's how to appear successful. 1) Present a Positive Image Your outgoing voice mail message
Category:
Sometimes you have people who appear to be spectators a meetg. There are many reasons why someone would decle to participate. For example, the person may feel reluctant to speak out, may disagree with the approach endorsed by others
Category:
We welcome new ideas, sort of. True, new ideas lead to creative solutions. But, they can be a challenge when they interrupt or distract the work on an issue. Here's how to bring your meeting back on track when some offers an
Category:
If you are like most business people, voice mail has both simplified and complicated your life. On the good side, it helps you exchange information. On the other side, leaving messages can seem like putting notes in bottles that drift off to sea. Here's
Category:
Other links at Business > Management
Another great thing about outsourcing IT is that you can outsource all the small projects your company has and let your company focus on larger projects.
Category:
You probably have a system for bookkeeping and payroll right now, but in the ever-changing world of business you have most likely heard there are more effective tools for putting the numbers to work for you.
Category:
The PMP (Project Management Professional) credential is the most sought after certification in project management today. It is overseen by the Project Management Institute. We explore 10 standard steps you should follow in order to successfully pass your
Category:
American dollars are very popular in Russian economy. Now is the good time to start trade with Russia.
Category:
Lots of business people still haven't woken up to China. They don't even consider doing business there and give excuses like - there's the language barrier, the strange customs or the very different rules and regulations concerning business in the middle
Category:
Site Sponsor
Directory Statistics
Articles: 68214
Categories: 501
Yahoo Entertainment
